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Tuesday, November 18, 2003

well, opening ceremonies for MUNSA (Model United Nations of San Antonio) was yesterday. we listened to some people talk including some senator who gave some long winded, off topic speach that went on forever. and then we ate dinner which was ok but it took me forever to get my food and once i got it, they dimmed the lights to start the stupid dance so i couldnt see the food i was eating. i hate it when i cant see what im eating. and the dance was ok cause it was good music. i didnt dance at all. i just sat watching everyone dance. it was pretty boring. the music was pretty good though. today we started with all the debates and stuff. i was unprepared and didnt really talk at all. and if i dont talk tomorrow ill probably fail. so i guess i have to talk. and now i feel like im gonna get sick cause i feel really shakey and cold. -sigh- i cant wait till thanksgiving break.

Tuesday, November 11, 2003

i wonder what happens after we die. are we reincarnated? if so, that would really suck because i would have no memories of this life. the thought of heaven scares me because its eternal life in this perfect world with no sadness or negative emotions, but if there were no negative emotions, how would we know we were happy. and in heaven, do we have memories? and what if nothing happens when we die. what if our thoughts and emotions are just chemical reactions in the brain and when we die, so do our emotions. it sounds logical. but i cant comprehend nothingness..

Sunday, November 09, 2003

heh. i just found out that we're going to my grandparents house, in ohio this christmas. i love it when my family makes decisions and tells me about them a month later. xp

Tuesday, November 04, 2003

-sigh- i love it when im happy and not worried about anything. its nice to just sit here and enjoy life instead of stressing out over meaningless crap like school. heh. ive got a test tomorrow in history.. and a sociology assignment due, and i have to finish up my geometry homework if my teacher is there tomorrow. but, its too late tonight ill just do it all tomorrow morning and at lunch. because thats how i function. i cant remember the last time i did my homework at home. not including my position papers which were mostly done at school and just stressed about at home. i really cant do stuff untill the last minute. i got 94's on both those position papers by the way. so anyways, ive decided not to stress out about stuff cause in the end, it always seems to work out. well im gonna try. n.n

Saturday, November 01, 2003

for some reason, for the past couple of weeks, ive had the strange desire to go to Wilmington, Ohio. its the little town where my mom grew up and where my grandparents live. i guess im tired of the same old San Antonio everyday, and wilmington is like the only other place i know. i wanna go somewhere. everyday i take the city bus and i catch it right in front of the greyhound bus station. and i think how simple it would be to hop on one of those buses and just go somewhere. maybe a big city like NYC or Boston. ooh i wanna go to boston. that would be so cool. the only places ive ever been to outside of Texas are Ohio and Missouri and then theres the states we drive through to get to those places. but we never did anything there except sleep and eat at their mcdonalds. oh actually i have been to west virginia. or maybe it was just virginia. but i was really little. it was on my mom's friend's farm. i remember seeing them milk a goat, and swimming in their hot tub and looking for tadpoles in the muddy pond...